A little background first on the dramatic personae for those who don't know, before I describe the conversation. It's a widely known fact already that 2/3rds of the people in the flying club are named David (including one of the instructors who can give checkrides). However, that doesn't begin to scratch the surface. I was talking to Rob Stauffer, who wanted to take a plane ("045") on a trip this weekend. Rob was sign up as #2 for the plane, because Rob Shuck had it signed out as #1 for a two week trip. Shuck hadn't left on the trip yet, because he is trying to take the checkride to get his IFR rating. Shuck can't use 045 for the test because of its equipment and instead needs to use a different plane ("230"). We also have a number of Cornell students in the club, some of whom are Asians and have short names that Westerners aren't used to. This will become clearer soon. Finally, I should mention that if you took Stauffer and removed his beard, there might be a passing resemblance to Lou Costello. Thus, our conversation the other day. Frank: So Rob, will you be flying this weekend? Rob: Well, I'd like to, but I'm not sure if I've got the plane. I left a message with Rob to see if he's planning on using 045. F: He's waiting on the IFR test. R: Why doesn't he use 045 for it? F: It's got GPS. He'd have to use another plane. R: So Rob has to use 230 for the test? F: Yeah. That's right, it's not around because He took it to Pennsylvania. R: Rob took it? F: No, He took it. R: He has the plane? F: Down in Pennsylvania. R: Rob's got the plane down in Pennsylvania? F: He has the plane down in Pennsylvania! R: Well then, why doesn't Rob just have David go with him in 230 to Pennsylvania to give him the test. F: Have three people in the plane?!? R: Three? It'd be just Rob and David. F: But Rob doesn't have the plane. He has the plane. R: Wait a second. How'd you get three? If he has the plane and David went with him, that'd be two. F: Plus Rob: three. R: But he HAS the plane. F: Exactly! Which is why Rob can't take the IFR test until it gets back. R: Now hold on there. Rob has 045. F: Rob reserved it for the trip months back. R: But Rob doesn't want to leave on his trip until he gets the IFR rating. F: It would certainly allow him more flexibility. R: So Rob won't be using 045, and instead wants 230. F: It's the only one Rob can take the test in. R: But 230 isn't here. Because Rob has it. Even though he doesn't have it. F: Now you've got it backwards. Rob doesn't have it because He has it. R: That's what I said: He doesn't have it. F: He DOES have the plane. R: He has the plane?!? F: Certainly. R: That's what I said. Rob has the plane. F: No! Rob doesn't have the plane. -- R: -- I know, he has the plane. F: Now you've got it. R: Look. Rob doesn't have the plane, because he has the plane. F: Exactly. R: Whatever. Anyway, he can't test in the plane which he doesn't have EVEN THOUGH HE HAS IT, so he'll have to wait till he gets back. But when he gets back, he'll take the test in the plane he has which he has even though he doesn't have, so he can take the plane which he has but doesn't have now, which is the one I have. F: Right! R: So he'll have the plane which he doesn't have, and a rating he doesn't have to go on a trip he's not on. F: There you go. R: The shoe's on the other plane now. F: What? R: I said the shoe's on the other plane now. F: Oh no. Shu doesn't have any plane now. He's signed up for it next week. R: Heeeeeeyyyyyyyy ABBOTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!