[This was received as a mail message to me from the unfortunate soul. It is submitted with the permission of the author, who, for reasons which will become obvious, wishes to remain anonymous. Edited by frank@cis.ohio-state.edu] From: SuperLoser@Booter.ORG Folks Last Sat, was the Department Christmas party. The Cocktail hour began at 6, I got there at 6:30. Pretty feeble beer, some punch, cash bar for drinks, so I passed on the hard stuff, had a few beers. They brought us wine with dinner. If you recall, I'm not big on wine, never have been. But seeing that wine was all I was going to get, I attacked it with gusto. Emptied out my water glass and started tossing back the red wine in it. I used my coffee mug for the white wine (it is unwise to mix your wines). A little bit about the Christmas party. It is a department affair, the profs their wives, the grads, their wives, their significant others, children etc. come over. There is a Christmas Play, lampooning the Profs, and they usually leave after that. Then, the Department band plays till about 1. Anyway, it is not wise to get drunk before the play, given that all the profs are there. Of course, that means it's just the sort of thing I would do. It is downright foolish to drink so much that you get sick. Never stops me from doing it. It is absolutely immature and irresponsible to drink so much that you are wide-eyed, legless, and throw up at the table, because there is no way you're going to make it to the bathroom. It is suicidal when the person sitting behind you is the department chair. Not only are you sick, you've pissed off everyone at your table, created a mess, a nuisance and a stink. Lord have mercy on my soul. [name withheld out of pity] From jain@cs.cornell.edu Sun Dec 2 23:04:38 1990 Received: from CU-ARPA.CS.CORNELL.EDU by cheops.cis.ohio-state.edu (5.61-kk/5.901120) id AA01677; Sun, 2 Dec 90 23:04:09 -0500 Received: from LOKI.CS.CORNELL.EDU by cu-arpa.cs.cornell.edu (5.61+2/1.91d) id AA15778; Sun, 2 Dec 90 23:03:45 -0500 Received: from FULLA.CS.CORNELL.EDU by loki.cs.cornell.edu (5.61/I-1.91f) id AA07902; Sun, 2 Dec 90 23:03:39 -0500 Message-Id: <9012030403.AA26152@fulla.cs.cornell.edu> Received: by fulla.cs.cornell.edu (5.65/N-0.11) id AA26152; Sun, 2 Dec 90 23:03:37 -0500 From: SuperLoser@Booter.ORG To: frank@cis.ohio-state.edu, todd@cis.ohio-state.edu, grichard@cis.ohio-state.edu, krouse-p@cis.ohio-state.edu, escoe@cis.ohio-state.edu, loren@cis.ohio-state.edu, renken@cis.ohio-state.edu, satish@cis.ohio-state.edu Reply-To: jain@cs.cornell.edu Date: Sun, 02 Dec 90 23:03:37 -0500 Sender: jain@cs.cornell.edu Status: RO Folks Last Sat, Dec. 1, was the Department Christmas party. The Cocktail hour began at 6, I got there at 6:30. Pretty feeble beer, some punch, cash bar for drinks, so I passed on the hard stuff, had a few beers. They brought us wine with dinner. If you recall, I'm not big on wine, never have been. But seeing that wine was all I was going to get, I attacked it with gusto. Emptied out my water glass and started tossing back the red wine in it. I used my coffee mug for the white wine (it is unwise to mix your wines). A little bit about the Christmas party. It is a department affair, the profs their wives, the grads, their wives, their significant others, children etc. come over. There is a Christmas Play, lampooning the Profs, and they usually leave after that. Then, the Steamin' Weenies, the Department punk band plays till about 1. The band has 2 profs in it, playing rhythm and lead. Anyway, it is not wise to get drunk before the play, given that all the profs are there. Of course, that means it's just the sort of thing I would do. It is downright foolish to drink so much that you get sick. Never stops me from doing it. It is absolutely immature and irresponsible to drink so much that you are wide-eyed, legless, and throw up at the table, because there is no way you're going to make it to the bathroom. It is suicidal when the person sitting behind you is the department chair. Not only are you sick, you've pissed off everyone at your table, created a mess, a nuisance and a stink. Lord have mercy on my soul. Neel From escoe Mon Dec 3 14:12:09 1990 Received: by furlong.cis.ohio-state.edu (5.61-kk/5.901120) id AA01529; Mon, 3 Dec 90 14:11:27 -0500 Date: Mon, 3 Dec 90 14:11:27 -0500 From: James Escoe Message-Id: <9012031911.AA01529@furlong.cis.ohio-state.edu> To: escoe@cis.ohio-state.edu, frank@cis.ohio-state.edu, grichard@cis.ohio-state.edu, jain@cs.cornell.edu, krouse-p@cis.ohio-state.edu, loren@cis.ohio-state.edu, renken@cis.ohio-state.edu, satish@cis.ohio-state.edu, todd@cis.ohio-state.edu Subject: Christmas chunks, errr cheer Status: RO Neel, I knew when we sent you off to the 'big time' you would make us all proud of you in your future endeavors, but how where we to know that our faith in you would pay such handsome dividends so soon? Keep up the good work and remember "... no Flounder you didn't throw-up in front of Dean Wormer, you threw-up on Dean Wormer". I'm sure it is no small consolation that at least you didn't` get the Chair's wife pregnant... or did you? Happy Holidays, Jim --- I can't wait to tell Gigi about this one!