From ucbvax!ucsd!usc!samsung!uunet!vtserf!creatures!bloss.cs.vt.edu!ramakris Sun Aug  5 21:57:26 EDT 1990
Article: 36603 of rec.humor
Path: tut.cis.ohio-state.edu!ucbvax!ucsd!usc!samsung!uunet!vtserf!creatures!bloss.cs.vt.edu!ramakris
From: ramakris@bloss.cs.vt.edu (S.Ramakrishnan)
Newsgroups: rec.humor
Subject: What UNIX can say !
Message-ID: <504@creatures.cs.vt.edu>
Date: 21 Jul 90 19:17:00 GMT
Sender: usenet@creatures.cs.vt.edu
Reply-To: ramakris@bloss.cs.vt.edu (S.Ramakrishnan)
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Organization: Virginia Tech Computer Science, Blacksburg, VA
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  The following article was sent to me by a friend of mine. Its
  not mine. I thought it was amusing and hence decided to post it
  to rec.humor.

Here is a list of some more Unix shell responses.  I don't remember where I
originally got it, so I can't give the proper credit.

Note that the '%' prompt indicates the C shell, while the '$' prompt
indicates the Bourne shell.  Go ahead and try some ...

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

% rm meese-ethics
rm: meese-ethics nonexistent

% ar m God
ar: God does not exist

% "How would you rate Quayle's incompetence?
Unmatched ".

% ^How did the sex change^ operation go?
Modifier failed.

% If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what would I have?
Too many ('s.

% make love
Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.

% sleep with me
bad character

% got a light?
No match.

% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.

% ^What is saccharine?
Bad substitute.

% %blow
%blow: No such job.

% \(-
(-: Command not found.

$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending!

$ drink <bottle; opener
bottle: cannot open
opener: not found

$ mkdir matter; cat >matter
matter: cannot create

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

  -- Ramakrishnan S, CS Dept, McBryde, VaTech.