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"Are we in a commited, exclusive relationship?"
"...I feel like I should say yes."
-- Match picked the correct answer to Kara's question (August 2023).
"I'd like to leave soon, I'm getting hungry."
"You're hungry like 90% of the time!"
-- Emily doesn't buy Kenji's excuse to leave pickup (August 2023).
"I'm trying to come up with a McConnell joke now but...uh..."
"You're freezing?"
-- Moof scores a topical zinger point against Frank (September 2023).
"I've disabled every notification on my phone, so the next sound--"
-- Tom was then interrupted by his phone. To be fair,
it was a call (October 2023).
"My oversight doesn't need oversight."
-- Emily does not need help making sure people pay for
Friday night pickup (November 2023).
[...] the receptionist said he would pass a note to the physician's
assistant too see if I needed a referral to Mount Cyanide. I was
like...is that a slip or are you trying to tell me something.
-- A great name for a Halloween hospital (November 2023).
"I come from a long line of stubborn."
"Blame everyone else."
-- Neither Robyn nor David realized how, in context, funny and
ironic it was (November 2023).
I feel fine but nonetheless, I am on the Mediterranean diet. Look
that one up and see how it differs from the way the rest of the world eats,
except the Mediterranean people.
-- Kathy is both precise and accurate (December 2023).
"Have you noticed any recent changes to your vision?"
"Yeah, I can see much better now!"
-- The tech at the eye doctor's office had just cleaned my glasses,
but I don't think that's what she was asking (December 2023).
You always blow out my emergency exit door with your aviation knowledge.
-- Ralley thinks 737 Maxs can't compete with me (January 2024).
"Aren't we all half centaur?"
-- KTM thought, though she said it wasn't original (January 2024).
I think I have some body of christ stuck between my teeth
-- Email from a friend at a funeral (February 2024).
"Take the whole damn thing! If you have heart problems,
you'll know what to do!."
-- Advice given to a cardiologist at a birthday dinner, who wanted
to cut the last beignet in half (February 2024).
"Is a 'spicy tent' an errection?" -- Allison playing word games (March 2024).
"Don't go with your gut, go lower."
-- Frank's guidance for 'So Clover' using dirty words (March 2024).
I just had a pt appointment and I said can I ask a stupid question and
he politely says there are no stupid questions, my response is 'that is
a lie, c'mon now.'
-- Sue has heard too many stupid questions (March 2024).
"Oh look, another ice-cream cone of meat!"
-- Overheard while walking on a Madrid street (March 2024).
Over the years, I have handled many odd requests for changes to papers,
and this is one of the oddest.
-- If it's weird to Eoghan, that's saying something (April 2024).
"There were five exclamation points in this email, and I didn't send it!"
-- Takes one to know one/Jessica was impressed (April 2024).
After more reps of normal treatment, they escalated to the "Rhino
Rocket" (tm) - a nasal tampon. They said insertion would be uncomfortable.
They lied.
I blacked out, twice. Much drama, many people. Apparently I was whiter
than progressive rock. Then had some snacks and felt better. Then as
they were about to discharge me, blacked out again. They called 911,
and Bangs took me to the ER.
-- A friend's 'simple' bloody nose was anything but that (April 2024).
"It turns out the only differene between science and horror movies
is your perspective."
-- spoken by someone who pulls the wings and legs off of
mosquitoes...FOR SCIENCE and pleasure! (May 2024).
I know this is Ithaca but the aerobics instructor I had this morning was
so unshaven that it looked like she was carrying two Yorkie puppies in
her armpits.
-- Reported by a veterinarian, so she'd know (June 2024).
George (3 years old): HEY FRANK! Come to my room so a can show you something!
Frank (enters room): Sure. What do you want to show me?
George: LOTS OF THINGS!!!
-- let's just say there were a many Legos there (June 2024).
I may have ruined my computer by mashing an over-ripe banana into the
charging ports.
[Addendum/explanation]
Stick banana in bag. Forget banana is in bag. Stick computer in bag
-- To her credit, Sue did not use the passive voice (June 2024).
I've been to the Cornell [vet school] one that does hydrocremation
and I've been to a more conventional one that does actual cremation and
guess what? They both smell like death. And on a hot summer day it smells
like extra superdeath.
-- Sue doesn't think a vet hospital's idea to build its own
cremetorium will fly (July 2024).
"Low expectations are the key to happiness."
-- Wisdom from Vassil, though he admitted that he doesn't
really believe in that (July 2024).
"We don't make fun of you. We look down on you."
-- Vassil on New Orelan's attitude towards Baton Rouge (July 2024).
"You can't step on a dog and squish it [like a cockroach]."
"Exactly!"
-- Why Aisha is OK with cockroaches, but not other animals, and agreed
surprisingly emphatically with my joking comment (July 2024).
"I kind of did it a second time, but really didn't do it at all."
-- Yoda wouldn't approve of Catherine's National November
Novel writing effort (August 2024).
"AIMING SUCKS! I WANT A PENIS!"
-- No context will make Carina's statement better (August 2024).
"Eat this fucking cake! I don't want to eat it for breakfast.
Actually, I do."
-- Erika to guests about JZ and Kam's birthday cake (August 2024).
"Annoyance is my strongest emotion."
-- Emily meant feeling annoyed, not being annoying (September 2024).
cunt is a term of affection so feel free to drop it liberally in conversation.
-- Sue provides guidance for Australia (October 2024).
"The song is the one thing we're..."
"Totally wrong on?"
"...yeah..."
-- Emily offers a more direct/accurate assessment of our trivia
answer status than what I was going to say (November 2025).
The list of previous selected "quotes of now" for 2024.
